Parachutes R' us??

Just an update on the clifhanger...

Well, I needed that parachute after all. Those rocks hurt!

The Curse of the Depot

Does the House always win? It seems as if the answer to this question is yes... The house, being the depot, of course.

So last week was fairly eventful in terms of "The Great Depot Escape." I had an interview on Tuesday, and then the same place called me back for another interview on Wednesday. I was calm, collected, and super-prepared for both the interviews, and I left with a smile on my face thinking, "yes, I think I've finally done it." Or... so I'd thought. I even wrote a brief thank you email to the last group of interviewers, as it was really great to be called back. That said, the rest of the week goes by, nothing from them... Holiday on Monday, so of course nothing then. Then, on Tuesday morning (today), I get an email back, saying that while they really liked me, and were impressed with my qualifications, something came up in their office, which might make them no longer need the position I had applied for. I also got a promise that one of them would be contacting me today, to let me know for sure.

CRAP, CRAP & MORE CRAP! My future is on the edge of a cliff yet again... and the depot is at the bottom where all the sharp rocks live -- Anyone got a parachute?

Job Hunting is Hard Work

Condemned to wallow in misery @ the Depot?

So this job/co-op job search is going nowhere... FAST! I've applied for close to 50 jobs, had one interview, and that's it. The co-op site tells you when you're rejected, and I'm finding I have a huge problem with it. Apparently NO is the hardest word I've had to deal with ever. It just seems like I'm going through the same viscious cycle yet again - School, apply for jobs, more school, apply for more jobs... I just want to get on with the rest of my life, maybe get a little apartment all to myself. I really didn't think that was too much to ask for - apparently, I'm wrong on this too. I know if I don't get a co-op during the fall term, I can postpone it, but don't want to postpone my co-op term until January... I'd rather kill myself than continue working at the Depot for that long.

Interviews, Fun?!? Not really, just a near death experience.

Wooo! Interviews are fun, and stuff like that. Transit, not so fun.

Okay, so yesterday's interview went quite well. It wasn't the most challenging interview I'd ever done, but the questions were very relevant and well thought out. I managed to refer to my portfolio for a couple of items, to back up what I was saying, but I didn't want to go through the entire thing. There just wasn't time for that, nor did the interviewers want to sit there and just be bored to death by pretentiousness. The items I did use, suprisingly, were from my graphic design section... I didn't really expect to rely on those items, but they asked for a time in which I used my creativity to solve a problem. What's more creative than creating posters as a way to increase sales/business?

Getting to the interview was pretty easy. I left at 8:45 from my house, because I wanted some time at the GO station to relax and enjoy a muffin & juice. The trip included 1 HSR bus, GO Transit to Long Branch, and then one Mississauga bus. I managed to get to the company about 50 minutes early for my interview... Mississauga transit's trip planner calculated that it'd take approximately 20 minutes to walk down Courtneypark Drive, from Dixie Rd (where the bus let me off). I don't know how slow they expect people to walk, but it was a 10 minute walk, even wearing a pair of heels.

Getting home should have been just as easy... just reverse the order of transit systems. It was, until my bus got into an accident at Dixie & Bloor. The bus had stopped (at a bus stop), let people on and off, and then, I heard a huge bang. 2 cars collided with each other behind the bus, and because of their impact, they rear ended the bus, hopped the curb, and smashed into a fence. No one on the bus was hurt... the bumper, and lights on the back of the bus had seen better days though. The bus driver has to get everyone off the bus, and he's like, "there'll be another bus" but didn't say when. The drivers of both cars were a bit banged up though, seeing as they'd both impacted the bus, as well as each other.

I made friends with the lady who sat in front of me, and told her I wasn't familiar with the area, and wondered if there was another way to get back to Long Branch GO. She told me to follow her, that she wasn't about to wait for the next Dixie Rd. bus either, that she usually gets off at Bloor anyways. She told me to follow her, and that she'd get me on the right busses to get me home sometime sooner than waiting for the next bus.

I ended up taking the Bloor bus to the Islington subway/bus station, had to pay another fare of $2.75 to use the TTC, and took a bus from there back to Long Branch. There's no direct GO trains from Long Branch to Hamilton, plus my stomach was growling and a headache was beginning... I'd only eaten the muffin, so I decided to get off at Oakville, and buy something to eat. I should have been home by 5 pm (without the accident), but instead I was just getting the train at Oakville station at that time.

In total, 4 different transit systems in one day was interesting, but not very fun.

Sick + Summer = Bummer

Sickness in the middle of Summer?

Apparently it is fully possible for me to get sick at any time, regardless of the season. So far, I've called in sick 2 days this week, and I know that no matter what, I can't afford to be off tomorrow. I have to work. No question about it. While under normal circumstances, I would love to have enjoyed my days off, I instead, have found myself sleeping all day, not eating solid foods, and having a hard time just being awake in general. Overworked? Quite possibly that's why I'm sick.

A Closet Full of Nothing

What to wear, what to wear....?!?

Alrighty, so I've finally got an interview for a co-op position. My newest conundrum is arriving at an appropriate interview attire decision. I'm undecided as to how dressy I want to go, so I have a few options...

1. Wear my simple black dress (one I wore to a prom)with my longer pin-stripe jacket. The long jacket is the only option with this, as there are slits on either side of the knee length dress. Good: it's a tried and true combination. Bad: it's the middle of summer, and I'll die of heat exahaution.
2. Wear my new black skirt with the tulle trim, a black shirt, and my white beaded jacket. Good: the skirt is totally appropriate, might not die in the heat. Bad: not sure if this look actually works.
3. Wear my strapless dress I wore to my Uni. Grad, along with the same white beaded jacket I'd worn with it. Good: I looked good in the outfit back in April '05. Bad: the dress is a floral print... quite bold actually. Doesn't scream formality.

Garrr! Sometimes being a girl sucks. At least I know which shoes I'm going to wear.

Depressed? Why yes, I am...

While I'm usually pretty good with disappointments, seeing as I've been dealt my fair share thus far in life, today's disappointments really got me down. Like usual, I put all my hopes on one particular job posting, and thought I had a really decent chance for it... or at least an interview. I'd also applied for another job at the same time, although I wasn't as attracted to the position. Today, I check the postings, and my applications and note that the less desirable job said NO to an interview. I thought, alright, good - I don't have to waste my energy with that one... I just had to wait on the other posting. Less than 10 minutes pass, and I get my answer on the job I really wanted... a big, fat NO. To make things sting even more, as luck would have it, my classmate beside me, was one of the 3 chosen ones for the interviews. I managed not to get upset at my own circumstance, and I'm truly happy that they decided to interview her - she's totally competent, and she really wants the positon too.

While I wasn't really upset earlier in the day, the more time I've had to think about it, the more upset I'm actually feeling. (I know this is derived from my irrational fear of being stuck at the Depot for all eternity.) Although I know I'm being way too hard on myself by saying this, but being shut down twice within a span of a few minutes, makes me feel as though I'm never going to be quite good enough for any other job. It also doesn't make me want to put myself out there again, and potentially get slammed with another fury of "NOs"

Perhaps a good long bath, a bit of crying, to vent my frustration is the key to getting over this mental block I've now put in place.

Dr. Phil, eat your heart out!

Move over Dr. Phil... Captain Obvious is putting you out of business... well, maybe.

I'd like to believe that part of my charm is my ability to listen, and give proper, sound advice when people ask for it. I try not to judge... honestly - it's not my decision to say what's right and what's wrong for someone else, but I will give my opinion, when asked. I'm quite used to the typical, "how do I know if he/she likes me" kind of advice, but lately, people have been asking things that go beyond my circle of knowledge and experience. That said, I think I've dealt with these queries as unbiased and politely as I possibly can.

Without naming names and going into too many details, I've been asked by several people, for advice on their sex lives... something which I would never proclaim to be an expert on, unlike Sue the sex lady, or Dr. Ruth, for example. I think it's hard to be an expert on a subject when you've just barely scratched the surface, based on your own personal experience. I realise I'm approachable, definitely a forward-thinking feminist, and that I'm a good source of advice (usually) - so I'm wondering, does this make up for my own so-called lack of experience? There's definately some situations that have been brought to my attention, that I know I wouldn't like to be in myself, but is that really enough for me to go on? On one hand, yes I do think that more "experience" (as I put it), would be nice to have, eventually, and would be beneficial when giving advice on said topic, but on the other hand, I'm quite comfortable with my experience status at this point in my life.

Cheating!!!

Low-down dirty cheaters... I say make 'em walk the plank! Yaaaaar, Matey!

So if you can't tell by the obvious title, I've had an encounter with a Cheating, Two-faced liar... albeit, not a guy, but a classmate. You'd think that in a post-graduate programme, that all the students would be honest, and would be more mature than grade school students, but nooooo, that assumption would be wrong. There's this one girl in my class who (on numerous occasions) has been caught cheating by another classmate. We've brought it to our instructors' attention, but it seems as if nothing is going to be done about it. This makes me very angry because it makes my education that I'm getting (and paying for) seem worthless, since the cheating has gone un-punished. The worst part of the situation is that this girl just brags the entire time about getting super-high marks. Garrrrrrr! I just know that if I ever attempted cheating, I'd be kicked out of school so fast it'd make my head spin, and the imaginary parrot on my shoulder would no longer have a home...

Blarrrrrgh! just about sums it up.

Blarrrrrgh!

I'm beyond tired today - haven't been sleeping right, and I'm not sure why. Perhaps stress is playing a large part in it. I'm still worried about my finances... how I'm going to afford the next 2 months - school, busses, bills, other expenses, and ultimately getting a new job (or actually a co-op job).... Worrying sucks!

Rocks & Hard Places

Hello Rock, meet Hard Place... wait, we've all met before.

Frig… just like usual, I end up with no cell service because of the stupidity of my provider. Now, I’m out of touch with basically everyone, until my provider pulls their heads from their butt and fixes this issue. I called during a break between classes today, got nowhere with a representative, and got talked down to like I was a 2 year old. I explained my circumstances, that I didn’t have a full time position right now, but that I was making an honest effort to have bi-weekly payments (albeit not the full amount, but at least it’s something… or so I thought). At least I’m not avoiding the bills… I’m just financially strapped at this point, and so I’m just trying to make it… barely.

Apparently, the last email communication went un-noted, as I explained that calling me on my cell during the day is not convenient, that they will only get my voicemail because I can’t answer the phone during class or work. Yet again, I get calls from their automated dialler, at all points in the day when I can’t physically answer the phone. How stupid are they?!?!?!?!?

This (for lack of a better word), asshat who I talked to today even went so far as to threaten to cancel my service… hrm… that would be a better alternative to the lack of service I currently receive, so be my friggin guest. They want to cancel it, fine, but I’m not paying anything extra. They’ll get what I owe them and nothing more. Seems to me like I’ve had this argument with them before. Garrrrrr.

On another note, ever work in a group to find you’re the only one (or two) that actually work?

For most of my classes, I’ve got group work, which until this term, I’ve been able to find like-minded people who put in the effort and actually do work. This term, I ended up in one group where 4 out of the 6 of us hauled ass in order to get the job done. We of course, got perfect on the assignment, but so did the other 2 people who didn’t contribute. Now, I’m in another group (5 people this time), and only 2 of us are actually doing any work whatsoever. The other 3 just expect to tag along for the ride. Today, they all offered to do something finally, but the help was too little, too late. The written part of the assignment’s due this Thursday, and we’re also presenting this Thursday. At this point, we should be (and are) finished… no thanks to the 3 of them. On one hand, I feel as though I’ve been too harsh on them, but if I can work, go to school, complete assignments, and make it to group meetings (commuting by bus & train), then the 3 of them should be able to at least go to school, complete assignments, and make it to group meetings. They also commute, but it’s one friggin bus… not 1 bus, 1 train, and another bus to finish off the trip… not to mention 1.5 hours each way.

I’m in the middle of another job search – hoping for a good co-op placement, which results in a full time job, or a great full time job that I can use as my co-op placement. Right now though, it seems as though there’s no jobs available, either on the campus co-op site, or on the regular job sites…. $6300 plus all my other expenses doesn’t seem quite worth it at this point.

Yet again, where is the rock I’d like to just crawl under for all eternity… or at least for a little while?

It's Quitting Time?

To quit or not to quit... that is the question weighing heavily on my mind. I had hoped to quit today, and even had my resignation letter completely typed, signed, and sealed, but alas, I have not quit - I wasn't able to find another job. This pisses the hell out of me that I've sent out so many resumes, but no one wants to give me a chance. I've got soooo much experience, but I guess that doesn't count, and is overshadowed by my so-called insane amount of education. Part-time jobs, right now are few and far between, and what makes it worse is that there are so many full time postings I could apply for if I'd done this HR thing back in September! Frig...

You Smell Good??? WTF?

What do you say when someone says, "You Smell Good"?

Alrighty, I've seen my share of weirdos, and dealt with my share of them not only while on the bus, but while dealing with the public at work. So Sunday, I'm busting my tail at the Depot, like usual, and get asked to help a guy find a paper shredder... Alrighty, not a problem, I've bullshitted my way through university, a stupid paper shredder sale is no problem whatsoever! The guy was totally unimpresed that a "Dumb Girl" was helping him, rather than one of the so-called "Techno-geeks". Needless to say, I sold him a shredder, and an extended warranty, by talking out of my butt... I really don't know every thing there is to know about shredders, but come on, how hard is it? - you stick your paper in the slot, and ooooh, it shreds your paper into tiny little pieces. The hardest part is figuring out how to turn it on, and clear a jam, should it happen. As I'm bringing the product to the cash register, the customer says to me, "I just thought I'd let you know, I like your perfume, you smell good." I honestly didn't know how to respond, so I just said thanks, and tried to leave him with the cashier... which didn't work. I got stuck ringing in the sale, and as part of the warranty process, I had to ask for his phone number, to register the warranty. Of course, he's like "Now you know my name, and my phone number," and winks at me. Man, if he'd been in his 20s and actually not a skeezy older man, then I'd be pretty happy about the entire situation - however, in reality, 40s, balding, and just plain scary, really doesn't work well for me. ~shudders~ I need a new job!

All seems to be right with the world, again.

After all the issues I had yesterday, and with how today went, this weekend has been one huge emotional roller coaster ride. Saturday was a huge low point for me, and all joking aside, I really do think I was out of my mind yesterday. I'm quite certain that my outburst yesterday was an explosion of emotion, brought about by several things not going quite the way I had envisioned... that and the fact that working at the depot makes me utterly crazy.

Happy 25th... er, then again, maybe not. This entire blog might sound selfish, but I'm using the excuse, "it's my party, and I'll cry if I want to..." Just a reminder, this entry's really not aimed at anyone in particular. I'm just writing exactly how I feel.

I've got less than three hours left before I turn 25, and I should be out having the time of my life, but instead, it's just before 10 pm and I'm at home in my pyjamas. No, I'm not sick, it seems as though everyone forgot about me. I'm so angry and sad at the same time, I'm not sure if I should be crying, or if I should be punching holes in inatimate objects. I know it's Easter weekend, but it would have been great if at least one person said that they'd like to do something either this weekend, or that they'd like to postpone any B-day festivities to a later date... at least then I wouldn't have been left hanging. Right now, I feel like I'm the biggest loser in the entire world. I thought that maybe, just one year, I'd have a great birthday -- one that I'd always look back on fondly. I have yet to have one of those birthdays. Instead, I'll always remember my 25th as the year I realized exactly how alone I really am. As I'm writing this, I'm looking around my room and also realizing that part of my problem is my inner geekiness.... maybe it's poking its head out and taking over my "outer" self now. No one wants to be friends with the geek, it's just not cool. Wow, I thought I'd never experience a "life-crisis" of any kind -- turns out my quarter life crisis/lifelesson is the discovery that I really don't know what exactly true friendship and belonging really is. This is making me question the friendships I've had for years, and the new ones I think I've made... perhaps being an outsider is easier than all this crap I'm feeling.

STRIKE!!! = BLESSING IN DISGUISE?!?!?

Alright, while most other college students I know are freaking out about the strike, I'm taking it as being a total blessing in disguise. My programme has me commuting 4 hours daily between Hamilton & Oakville, using 3 separate transit systems, 5 days a week. Then on weekends, in order to pay for college, I'm commuting another 4 hours daily between Hamilton & Burlington, just to work at my crappy, underpaid part time job at the depot. Needless to say, all this travelling, school, homework, and work has made me very tired, and extremely sick. Instead of revelling in the glory of an "extended reading week", I will be attempting to battle the last of my flu. I haven't seen outside since the 5th, and I've been in pyjamas since I got home from work that same day (excluding showers... they have to come off sometime). Today alone, I've made and consumed two rather large pots of tea, and I'll be working on the third, by the time 8pm rolls around. Solid food at this time eludes me completely, and I would probably die for something as simple as a piece of dry toast right now. I'm promising myself that I will be 110% better by the time Friday comes around, seeing as I really don't want to be sick at work again. Being sick at home is much easier than being sick someplace where you can't get comfortable, and have to pretend that everything is perfect.

Oh, and one more thing, I'd like to thank whatever holy entity wants to take credit for the invention known as neo citran... I'd probably be feeling far worse now if I wasn't taking it.

I'm so ready to just curl up and sleep for an eternity! This week off school has not been a vacation at all. Earlier this week I was concentrating on my job search, and working on my one project due in the middle of my reading week. Thursday, I had to travel to school, hand in the project, and meet with my group for another class. Then today (Friday) I picked up an extra shift at work. Usually for my past reading weeks I've gone away for at least a weekend, just to get away from it all and regroup.

I feel frazzled, stressed, and sooooo incredibly tired. As soon as I'm done school & the co-op, I think I'm going on vacation... somewhere warm, with many pools, and free drinks with umbrellas in them.

And I thought procrastination was just for the student-kind!

I'm attempting to get some assignments done today, one of which is due tomorrow. I've been working on this journal assignment since the beginning of February, but it's taking me forever to get it done. I've also got an interview assignment due next week, which I had started as well, back on February 6th, giving the person I emailed the questions to, plenty of time to get their responses back to me, so I could finish that assignment. Needless to say, I'm still waiting for the answers to the questions I sent. I sent another email today, reminding her that I need her responses asap, so I can assemble the assignment. Of course, I get an out of office reply, and she won't be in the office from yesterday, through to Friday. So, yet again, my attempts to get work accomplished are foiled by a procrastinator. What I don't understand is why she agreed to help in the first place, if she knew she either wouldn't have the time to help, or if she just didn't want to help. Gaaaaarrrrrrrrrrr! it's so sad when I'm the only responsible one. Now, I've got a few decisions/choices to make:

1. Hold my breath that she'll respond in time for me to hand it in.
2. Try to find another person, last minute to answer the questions.
3. Answer the questions myself, and lie, saying that I did indeed interview someone.

Ethically, #3 is totally out of the question, and not how I'm supposed to do the assignment. The assignment itself is supposed to be largely a learning experience.

#2 could make me seem foolish to the person I approach for the interview, but seems the most appropriate choice, and #1 kind of leaves me hanging with the possibility that my assignment won't get done in time.

I've definitely learned something already... If you want something done, don't rely on anyone else to help you. Man, I hate depending on people, just because I've been let down far too many times, especially in groupwork situations.

Today seems like the never-ending day. I made it to school fine, but now that I'm here, I'm ready to go home. While the instructor for the first class is nice & all, I find the class pointless. I could just read this stuff, and be done with it. I'm not looking forward to the next class though... it's more of a waste of time than this. I have better things to do with my time than go over the same stuff she's been talking about since the first class.

Have you ever felt like what you were doing was pointless?

Today was one of those days. I'm sitting in class, and realising that all I'm hearing is "blah, blah, blah..." This is the most useless and pointless class I've ever had to sit through. The instructor keeps drilling the same useless information into our heads.... and then I remember exactly how much I'm paying for this waste of time. Honestly, no one in the class is paying any attention to her, and yet she goes on and on, and on like the energizer bunny. The only typing that's going on are those of us who are doing other things like talking on msn, writing emails, writing blogs, working on other assignments... and yet she doesn't notice. I've got 35 minutes of this bull$&^! left. Garrrr! I want to leave NOW!

Happy Groundhog Day!

I woke up this morning, feeling excellent, only to have my stomach cause issues. That said, I think I've figured out my problem through a bit of self-diagnosis. Hear this, cows of the world, I am refraining from eating beef, you are now safe from being eaten... at least by me. I've only come to this conclusion because of how I've felt after eating spaghetti & meatballs last week, and then eating meatloaf last night. Of course, I could always be wrong, but I'd prefer to be safe than sorry. Luckily there's other meat options out there that I can eat without feeling ill. The only good thing about feeling not quite right today, is that I'm getting the much needed relaxation I've been missing because I'm in school/working 24/7.

Alright, today was considerably suckier than yesterday… yes that’s right boys and girls, life has thrown yet another curveball, and I’ve managed to strike out so far… 3rd time’s the charm, which means 1 more series of unfortunate events ~hehe… thought of the movie~ and I may as well just give up on the entire going to school thing.

I found out that my osap entitlements got reassessed, because of the piddly little income I estimated for the 8 months that I’ll be in school. Honestly, working 2 days a week is not really even worth the money, but I can’t just quit my job, since I have other bills that have to be paid. At this point, even with every single penny I’m estimating I’ll bring in (not subtracting income tax & other deductions), I’ll be short money during the 8 months of school.

I’ve already applied for a needs based bursary, which I’m told everyone gets to help them out. That said, I’ll still be strapped for cash. Now I’ve got 2 more forms to fill out before the financial aid department can even help me. There’s another general bursary, for which I have to show my budget for the school year, and there’s a form to fill out to dispute the change in osap funding because of my transportation costs. At least someone listened to me this time though, and provided the forms… unlike last time around. I’m getting quite annoyed with having to tell more than one person about my situation, in an attempt to get things fixed. For the next little bit, I will become a hermit… yes, a hermit - - seeing as I can’t afford to do anything except for go to school, return home, and work on weekends.

On top of everything, I get to the GO station, I’m on the right platform, and for some reason or other, the Westbound train pulls in on another track… We run to catch the train, I get stuck with the slowest moving person in the world in front of me going up the stairs, and I get to watch the doors close in my face.

A nice rock to live under would be nice… somewhere where the bill collectors and everyone else who wants my money can’t find me, and where trains don’t exist either.

Today was relatively uneventful, and time seemed to go by extremely fast. During my first class, I looked at the clock thinking that only 15 minutes had passed since class started; however, I realised there was only 45 minutes left from a 2 hour class. And then my second class of the day was over in a flash as well. If only all of my days were like this, then I wouldn’t feel so tired on the way home. I think today seemed much better than every other day for the past three weeks, since I didn’t have that missing tuition payment hanging over my head. I just hope that OSAP comes in sooner rather than later, so I can pay off some bills and buy the rest of my books.

In all, it seemed as if I got more accomplished today than since term started at the beginning of January. I dropped of my bursary application, and even travelled to Toronto to get my student ID for GO transit. Although, I may be a wee bit more depressed tomorrow when I actually shell out more money for transportation.

Woo Whee!!!! School troubles straightened out, I hope!

So finally today, things have improved. I got the trace back from the bank yesterday, proving I paid the $ to the school. So today, I approached the financial services department to straighten this problem out once and for all. I got my student ID card finally, my osap was released, and I got the application for the student GO pass... FINALLY!

Yay, I've got no complaints for today... so far.

Well it's been a very interesting first few weeks of the new year. I've made it through the first full week, and now I'm progressing into my second week. I still have the "unpaid" fees hanging over my head, and I'm waiting for the bank & the school to work together to fix this problem. I can't get my student ID, can't pick up my osap, can't afford my books, and can't get student fares for the GO train.... I'm stuck waiting, and it really sucks large. Garrrrr! I really can't wait for this to be fixed.

On a more positive note, I'm enjoying most of my classes... there's just one that I'm finding is a waste of time, but I think it's because the instructor isn't very organized. Surprisingly, I'm really liking the Industrial Relations, which I went into thinking that I'd be bored out of my skull. Yay, a good surprise for a change!

I'm just not sure how long I'm going to be able to last with the 5 days of school, and then working on Saturdays and Sundays. That said, working only on the weekends has totally reopened my eyes about why I liked working at the Depot to begin with. I know, this is strange, especially since the Depot has been the bane of my existence for so long...

Happy Festivus, from the Rest of Us!

Yes, there's actually a sign out there that says this... and it makes me laugh every time I pass by it. (If you're looking to see it, it's on the outside of the sports equipment store by General Hospital, right next to Tim Horton's.) So began my day :) At 6am, I definitely needed something to laugh about! I was actually aiming for the Go train leaving around 6:30, but ended up catching the earlier train... which worked out perfectly anyways. Then, leaving school, I ended up catching the train directly home, rather than transferring onto a bus, which was pretty awesome for me. So overall, today gets 2 thumbs up.

Update to the story below....

At 5:20 pm, the music finally died, which was 1/2 an hour longer than I had expected...

I went to the orientation, and this lady from the business department, bless her soul, had been fighting on my behalf all day long. She got everything changed for me, and I got to pick up my laptop tonight. Not only that, but my schedule is finally available! I met most of the people in my programme tonight... there's under 40 people who were selected from a couple of hundred applicants. Everyone seems really really nice, and one lady even offered to drive me to the Oakville GO station, so that I didn't have to take the bus. Unfortunately, I had to wait around for the laptop training.

The training ended around 9ish, so I trucked it over to the bus stop, only to find out that I didn't have to rush... the bus doesn't come until 9:13 to be exact. At the GO station, I was certain the train had already left, but I saw it as the bus pulled in... so I cancelled my ride, and attempted to get on the westbound train. This dumb lady plowed right into me, knocking me over, and thereby making me fall and miss my train. Of course excuse me wasn't in her vocabulary. Later on, I tried calling home to let my dad know that I'd be later, and the same dumbass bumped into me again. I lost it on her, and I didn't care. Because of her, I was stuck waiting another hour for the next train.

I'm home and comfy now, and all the hardships of the day will soon be forgotten... as soon as I go to bed :P

Today's interactions have led me to wholly believe that something is trying to keep me stuck at the depot. Yet again, my efforts to proceed with my education are thwarted. The bank is doing a trace on the money that the school says they never got. The lady at the bank tried to get information for me right then and there, but she didn't have access to that information. My life is now put on hold for another 2 weeks while I wait for the trace to arrive in the mail. Because of this, I can't pick up my loan, so I can't get my books. I still don't have a schedule, and it seems as though no one cares. I'm shuffled around from department to department, and the only answer I get is "Sorry, I can't help you with that." I'm quickly finding myself getting more and more depressed over the entire situation. If only I would have had enough time to physically deliver the money to school, rather than use the ATM... then I wouldn't be dealing with this huge mess.

I don't even know if I should stay for the orientation session. Watch them tell me I can't participate because my fees are allegedly unpaid. Maybe I should just tell someone at the registrar's office to refund my money, that I'm sick of all this bull... although then, I'm stuck with my money in limbo, and I'll be resigned to work at the depot, pretending that I'm happy with my job. I'm sick of lying to the managers and customers that I love my job, and that I'm oh so loyal to the compay. To be honest, a small part of me wishes that I would have been the one to rip the company off for thousands of dollars...

I've still got to wait 2 hours before this orientation session starts... I really don't know what to do. Part of me wants to stay, in the hope that someone will take pity on me for this huge mix up, while the other part of me wants to run from this place, screaming. I don't know how much more rejection I can be subjected to before I snap. I've been made to feel as if this entire situation is my fault, and quite frankly, I'm sick of it. The next person who tells me "I can't help you, your fees aren't paid," will be rightly told to piss off. Neither the school or the bank want to take responsibility for this problem, and each institution keeps on blaming the other. The entire situation is out of my hands, and I am not assuming responsibility for this, nor will I be further penalized for someone else's incompetence.

All I want to do is go to school. I've kept my end of the bargain, so I don't think it's too much to ask.

I've also come to the realization that at some point, my palm is going to run out of battery juice, and I'll be left sitting here in silence, stewing over everything that's gone wrong thusfar. If it lasts another 15 minutes, I'll be extremely surprised.

One large accomplishment for the day is that I've managed to take 4 different transit systems in one day! HSR, Burlington Transit, GO Transit, and Oakville Transit. I truly think I'm the "Greenest" person I know, at least for today, seeing as I've used that many public transit systems.

Really not a great day...

So I go to school to pickup and register my laptop, only to find that even though my fees are "paid in full" when I check the website, the school still hasn't marked that I've paid anything. Because they have no record of payment, I'm not allowed to pick up my laptop or get my student ID made. Right after the really nice guy from the school told me he couldn't do anything more to help me, even though he'd like to, I holed myself away in the nearest bathroom stall to vent my frustration. 10 minutes, and a couple of mascara smudged, red eyeballs later, I'm on the bus, and on my way back home. Needless to say, I wasted 3 hours of my day travelling to and from Oakville, on top $10 in bus/train fare. I've got to waste more of my day tomorrow, calling the bank again, trying to get everything straightened out, even though I was told everything was processed correctly. AAAAAAARGH!

Running out of time?!?!?!

Yet another year has gone by. It's so strange how fast time seems to progress each year. The older I get, the faster it goes. For example, at 5 years old, one minute would seem like an eternity. Now at 24, a minute never seems long enough for anything. I never used to pay attention to time, and now it seems like time is always on my mind. I also worry about time... "Do I have enough time to do...? How long will it take me to do this? Will leaving at __ time make me late, early, or right on time?!?" Yes, I sound like a nutcase. The list could go on, and on forever. I feel so restricted, yet at the same time (there's that word again), I'm comforted by knowing that time is constant, not something that will just stop one day, out of the blue. Maybe one day I'll stop obsessing so much with time in every sense of the word.

My first post of the New Year!

Okay, so New Year's Eve was not the typical party night... but when is it ever a typical party night for my friends and I???? I really preferred they way things went this year. It was relaxed, no-rush, and completely fun. Our girls' night in consisted of a nice dinner, and then sitting around reading "trashy chick magazines", doing the quizzes in said trashy chick magazines, watching a movie, missing the ball drop in NY, because we forgot about it :P, playing video games, and just not caring about what we as young adult women were "supposed" to be doing on New Years.

Frankly, partying it up at a bar, getting so shitfaced that you don't even know your own name, and ending up hooking up with some guy whom you'll never see again after that night, just doesn't seem like fun to me...

Things I learned this New Year's Eve (that I didn't already know)....
According to the "TCMs" and the quizzes from the "TCM's", I am a nice medium between Ice Queen and Approachable, I more closely align with Angelina Jolie, than I do Jennifer Anniston, and I am relatively good at decoding so-called "guy-speak" and body language". Oh, and I can't forget my educating experience reading the guy dictionary... Motor Boat... ROTFLMAO! Honestly, I would have never guessed.